Men Make Men

Its true, men make men.

Or we could say, "Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another." (Proverbs 27:7)

Actually, and more importantly, fathers who invest in their sons make men. But western culture has moved away from this in a variety of ways. Absent fathers, or fathers who are disconnected from their sons and emotionally stunted, play a role in this matter. Add to that the "pornification" of our culture that twists the minds of young boys and men. Sadly, we have also abandoned customs and rituals that bless sons and usher them into manhood. The concept of what it means to be a man is often diluted to little more than sports clichés and locker room jokes.

I don't have a son, I have daughters. But my hope is that I have modeled for my daughters what godly manhood looks like. And my prayer is, they will recognize genuine masculinity and seek that in their future spouses.

I recently read this article that nails this issue directly. The author, who is much more articulate than I am, explains the problem in greater depth. Take five minutes to read it and perhaps discover what's behind your own story of learning to be a man.

My father was not absent, but he was limited in his own ability to teach me. I'm not sure his father ever really connected with him on a deep level. Hard work, hunting, fishing and other sports were a big part of my man-training. Not bad things, just not enough. We didn't talk about life. He didn't share much about his story. He did love me and he even said the words (which I believe is important). I did finally see him cry and show a measure of authentic emotion, but this only occurred as I was heading off to college and well on the way to forming my ideas about manhood. He did the best he could. It is only in the last several years that I have become aware of how my father influenced me and my view of masculinity and a host of other areas. Thankfully, this growing awareness has been helpful. I don't spend time lamenting what I didn't receive from my father. He was a broken man, like me. I am thankful for him. But also, I am thankful for the men who have come into my life more recently who have been part of challenging me to authentic masculinity. Even in my 50's I am learning what it means to be a man. Maybe I can be part of encouraging others.